Lacking self-control

I hate all-nighters so fucking much. During and after all-nighters, all I do is eat. Eat eat eat eat binge binge binge binge... Since midnight I've already had a shitton of calories and, as such after an all-nighter, I don't have enough energy to go do anything about it. Considering purging since I'm going to have to be at the gym for like 5 hours if I want to burn enough but I really don't want to break my purge-free streak nor do I want to ruin my throat further since it's already sore from me having a cold. Brilliant. I hate myself. It's only 9am and today is terrible.

To add insult to injury, I saw today while my roommate was changing while being late for her class that she basically looks..is..just as thin as I am. Seriously? Even with all the disgusting crap she eats? Why do I have to try so fucking hard to look the same..... I'm like seriously 10 lbs lighter too.... The world makes no sense.

After today, I just don't want to eat anymore. I would rather not eat than purge.